Mademoiselle

GAP turned all French girl cool last night in Covent Garden, where they showcased their next Autumn/Winter 2008 collection to the press. It was sort of John Lewis ‘back to school’ meets Lanvin. Team ELLE loved it. I need one of the short black-boxy-boy coats and a pair of the cute pointy mod flats ASAP.

Being a football widow several times a week I decided to take action. Women need hobbies too you know. The Boy plays five a side footie twice a week (Monday’s and Thursdays), watches Soccer am on a Saturday morning (10am) which conveniently blends into the pre-match build up on Sky (noon), he then goes to watch the match at the Fulham ground (3pm). When he finally gets home via the pub (6pm), he re-watches the match he’s just seen live at the ground on Sky Plus (7pm), just in case he has missed anything that the pundits talk about. He then watches match of the day (10pm). How annoying.

So what should a football widow do? Netball, knitting, salsa, golf? Most activities involve some sort strenuous physical activity and I don’t do strenuous, unless it’s power shopping. Anyway, I’m more of a darts tart than a croquet chick so a month ago I hit upon the idea of a women’s darts night - onnnnnnnnneeeee hundred and eeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiggghhttttttyyyyy……!!!!!!!!!!!

I walked into my local boozer at 8.30pm last night and it looked like a scene from Shameless. My Facebook invite said that a designer prize (a pair of Celine sunglasses) would be given to the DAG of the night (think WAG with darts, more bling and belly). It was totally hilarious, it’s amazing what the thought of a designer prize can do to women. One friend strapped on a beer belly and wore a bikini over the top of it.

Our darts tarts, who were in teams of two, had the most inspired team names; The Royal College of Darts, Love will tear us a dart, Murder on the darts board…. Brilliant. Something fabulous happens when you mix alcohol, darts and 40 women dressed up as tarts in a pub on a Thursday night – and I’ve got the bruises to prove it. I thought I was going to get chained up to the lamppost with severall yards of Elizabeth Duke gold chains when I won the entire tournament! Obviously I gave up MY first prize win which was a Mulberry Poppy bag in mustard (begrudgingly – I.E it was ripped from my arms by 40 screaming darts tarts). I raffled it off instead and I raised £500 for a charity animal rescue home! Ahhhh, absolutely barking and a good night was had by all.